Friday, February 25, 2011

Breathe

Occasionally I am reminded about keeping 'it' simple, appreciating the moment. Breathe.

I am realising that all of the worries, stresses and anxieties that can overwhelm and cloud my spirit are given more of my power, my energy and my time than they are worthy of. Breathe.

I have found myself getting quite lost in these feelings of late - and frankly, I am just bloody tired of it. I do not like the shroud of fear, worry and angst that has settled over my world due to a situation I did not create and can not control. Breathe. Slowly-Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

I have given myself over more to these feelings than I have to my family, to my friends and to those that make my heart sing and soar - the very people who have always been around, available and ready to catch me when I was ready to let it all go. Breathe. Slowly-Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

My beautiful friend had her first baby last week - a delicious bundle of loveliness - 'Ella Rose'.
I went to visit them yesterday and I spent what felt like an age just having her resting on my legs sleeping and finding myself once again lost.

Mercifully lost in the wonder and the magnitude of the new born baby.
Lost in the stark reality and simplicity of life.
Lost in the beauty and perfection of new life.
Lost in the vision of my dear friends look of absolute love and devotion to her new baby illustrated throughout her body and face.
Lost in the new identity that my friend now has - Mother.

Amazing little reality check, really. Breathe. Slowly-Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

For the wonderful new human who now has the title of "fairy god-daughter", I have made these



from found fabric.
The top (embroidered) side of the shoe is cut from the edge of a table cloth and the back and sole from some printed pink corduroy discovered in 'the stash'.
I loved making these - it's been ages since my last sewing session (dear Father) and I am feeling energised and excited to start again.
My sister's 'bestie' also had a baby last week - a boy, so I will make another pair for him - 'Samuel'.

Feeling crappy is so insidious - I have felt like I am carrying a satchel of worry and broken-ness. At times it has felt too hard to be near other people for fear of weighing them down with my negative energy.

Breathe. Slowly-Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

Thankfully, mercifully, there are some amazing people out there who inspire, love, support, care, encourage and share with you. Lift you, help you to remember 'you'.
There are also baby shaped bundles of pure bliss, child sized bundles too - that look up to you with outstretched arms and call you 'Mummy'.
There are the great strong arms, broad shoulders and the gentle soul of a man so beautiful thinking about him can make me weep with the knowing that he is mine and I am his.
There are some simply wonderful people out there and I am so very grateful.

To the super fun, clever, warm and welcoming women in town who create loveliness and inspire me - I thank you.
To the family who loves me - I thank you.
To the friends from 'home' - I thank you - and I miss you!

Breathe. Slowly-Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.

To the crappy shitty energy and those who wouldst revel in ugly ugly behaviour - you can sod off!
Exhale and let go.......

And now go see who else has stuff to show and tell over here
Cheers.

7 comments:

snowflakes4sam said...

Lucky darling girl to have such a wonderful fairy god-mother like you that makes beautiful first shoes! came across this quote of the week when i opened my diary in anticipation - "Hanging onto resentment (or other nasty thoughts ... my words not quote) is letting someone you despise live rent-free in your head." Ann Landers. So breathe and let go and know that you will never fall there's many of us that will help you down and then assist you to fly again. x

beck said...

Hey honey, sorry to hear how things have been, but it looks like you have much to celebrate as well. I've been thinking of you lately and wondering when we will catch up. Lots to chat about over a cuppa, take care beautiful xo

jodie said...

I'll carry some of the crap for you.

The wee shoes are divine!

Claire said...

Hey Peta, have found you blog via Kate at Foxs Lane.

Sounds like life has been a bit topsy turvy for you.......
I do hope that you are feeling better, able to 'exhale and let go' now.
Your post actually bought tears to my eyes, talking about your lovely family and friends.
When we start looking, we all have much to be thankful for.
Gorgeous gift you made for Ella Rose.

Take care and enjoy your weekend,

Claire :}

Julie said...

A good reminder to us all. Love the little shoes.

Copper Patch said...

Yup, you've said it how it is and as usual you can see the world for what it is - something special, made up of all those wonderful things. I'm pretty sure the shite bits are to remind us not to overlook the fabulousness that is little arms, big muscley ones and sniffing babies.

Keep creating and taking time to enjoy a beer shared with you man-mate.

See you for tea soon xxx

Zane Wooder said...

Many of our fears never come to be. It's so silly and unproductive to worry about things yet we do so any ways. The foods you eat and lifestyle you live can help reduce it but at the end of the day we all have anixety to a degree.

-Zane of ontario honey